“Mourners at Rutgers University honored the memory of Tyler Clementi, whose death last week was the fifth suicide by a gay teenager in the last three weeks. Seth Walsh, a 13-year-old in Tehachapi, Calif., hanged himself from a tree in his backyard last month and died after more than a week on life support.” ~ New York Times
I try not to get angry on a blog that is supposed to be spiritual in nature, but I am beside myself. What is it going to take for people to STOP teaching hate? How many children and teens have to die before we wake up?
Religious leaders, politicians and parents who know, love or support gays and lesbians, to you I say, “thank you and God bless you.” You have no idea how important your role is in today’s society. You might think to yourself, “I am just one person, how can I have that much of an effect on other people?”
It only took one or two people hating, teasing and bullying to drive five gay youths to take their own lives in the last three weeks alone. One or two people’s teasing, bullying and harassment created such a hostile environment that these children saw no other way out of the torture than to kill themselves.
If you are a religious leader, politician, or parent supporting anti-gay policies like “Proposition 8,” “Defense of Marriage Act” and “Don’t Ask Don’t Tell,” don’t fool yourself into thinking that these laws, beliefs or policies are simply defending marriage or protecting our servicemen. On the contrary, these laws give people the impression that gays and lesbians have less value and don’t deserve the same rights or respect as every other human being, therefore, bullying, degradation and harassment are tolerated.
If five children of any particular race or religion had committed suicide because of bullying or harassment in just three weeks time, people would be outraged. It’s time to be outraged! I believe in free speech, absolutely, 100%. But you are absolutely, 100% responsible for the good and the harm caused by exercising your right to speak your mind.
So please, I am begging you to set aside your “beliefs” and use your words responsibly. Use your words to spread love, compassion and empathy and just for a moment, imagine if it was your child that had been driven to suicide by hateful words. Regardless of your beliefs, choose to speak out against hate.
4 comments:
I like this lots, G. It takes everyone speaking up when the hate is expressed or the innuendoes offered.
What I see, and it goes beyond this horrid series, is the "hostile environment" you mention. That environment is growing so that more and more human beings become "designated" as targets. Too many are feeding the hate.
Thanks for speaking out
Marty
Great posting and an important message for everyone to keep in mind daily. Words really can hurt people in more ways than people ever imagine.
I agree with you however, let me just counter you... children today are being bullied by other children. A Child's first teacher is the parents & family. So what great parents & family to teach a child that teasing another child to this point is totally acceptable. Where are the parents held responsible for the actions of the child that they taught?
Just like with dogs, Chow Chows get such a bad name yet I've owned so many I could probably not name them all. They never bite unless in defense and in my case that was ONE dog out of twenty. Chow Chows do what they are taught and the ONE that did bite was taught to protect, so she was indeed doing her job. Yet more people are scared of a Chow then of almost any other dog, except maybe a pit. (And even I am scared of Pits, not because they are Pits but because of the pounds of pressure their jaw itself has when it bites.) I've seen more then one of them bite without it being in defense. If a dog is taught, mistreated or other wise unsocialized then they will ALL bite. Yet, parents teach their child(ren) to joke about others. Even if its just making a joke about someone's weight in a store or in public. That action alone teaches a child that it is indeed all right to tease, haze and other wise torment another child without mercy. A bigot does not teach their child to NOT be a bigot.
People need to remember that in almost every religion there is ONE standard rule, "Do unto others. Love thy neighbor. Harm None." Or any other rule that is similar to those.
As I have taught my children... if you won't like it, neither will another person. DON'T DO, SAY or ACT without thinking of how you would feel. My 3rd son was teased (hazed to be frank) all because his name was Ray and it rhymed with gay. Although he was not gay (quite the ladies man to be honest) it upset my son to be called it by another boy. I told my son, "He's jealous because you know how to get and keep a girlfriend. YOU do not hit your girlfriend(s), you speak to girls with respect and as equals AND that boy resents you for it." Don't play his games and ignore him. I wish I could say that worked but it did not. It only made things worse until the two had to battle it out. The school gave my son the worst punishment and the other boy got the least. So where is the justice? First you have parents teaching a child it is all right to do to another child and then you have "some" schools that do NOTHING to protect a child from such acts.
The boy that teased my son without mercy is now in jail for domestic violence. That is the chain of events for such behavior. The parents raised this child to be a bully, the school allowed the bully to continue with his ways and the LAW caught up with him and now he is serving 20 years. Is this truly how to stop the hazing in society? HOPE the law can catch them, when it didn't start there it just ended there.
B-L
Barbara, allow me to counter your counter. I actually don't think you are countering me at all. In fact, you just strengthened my point when I said "If you are a religious leader, politician, or parent supporting anti-gay policies like “Proposition 8,” “Defense of Marriage Act” and “Don’t Ask Don’t Tell,” don’t fool yourself into thinking that these laws, beliefs or policies are simply defending marriage or protecting our servicemen. On the contrary, these laws give people the impression that gays and lesbians have less value and don’t deserve the same rights or respect as every other human being, therefore, bullying, degradation and harassment are tolerated."
I think we are on the same page! Thanks for your comment!
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